The secret to a successful marriage is there is none. All happy marriages share something in common: two people who have devoted energy, effort, and time into each other. It might sound simplistic, but a foundation of compassion and dedication is all it takes to keep a marriage strong through the years.
But all marriages, successful or not, need constant guidance and maintenance. It could involve therapy or counseling or even a conversation with a divorce lawyer in Colorado Springs just to consider your options.
Here are a few pointers for ensuring a happy and healthy marriage or partnership:
Keep their secrets to yourself
If your significant other tells you one of their secrets, you should always take it seriously. Sharing a secret is a highly intimate act, and it is up to you to maintain that level of trust. All shared secrets, no matter how small or trivial, should never be shared with others. Not even with your closest friends and family.
Even if you think that a secret is insignificant, your spouse might not feel the same way. They will feel betrayed, and it is hard to restore lost trust.
Private matters should remain private
Arguments are normal, and you might feel annoyed with your significant other once in a while. But that is not an excuse to share personal details of your marriage to other people.
Not only would it cause unnecessary embarrassment; you are also permanently changing the way your friends or family see your spouse. Always respect the privacy of the relationship and do not air your dirty laundry.
The best marriages split the household responsibilities evenly. It makes for a more egalitarian setup and avoids inadvertently passing on outdated social norms to your children (if you have any).
You can allocate household duties based on skill or preference. For instance, one person could be in charge of cooking and washing the dishes while the other cleans the rooms and does laundry.
Not everything should be taken seriously
There is no such thing as a perfect relationship, and your partner might be doing something that you find annoying or troublesome. But that does not mean that you have to argue over it. Let small annoyances slide.
Does your partner leave used tea bags on the countertop? Then throw it out. Do they forget to replace the toothpaste cap? Buy his and her toothpaste tubes. These are minor things that do not warrant serious discussion.
Always stay calm
Anger is normal. And sometimes you just need to talk it out with your partner. But instead of lashing out, always remain calm when discussing issues.
Being calm and rational during a discussion keeps it from devolving into a full-blown argument. Serious discussions, if done correctly, help bridge communication gaps in any relationship.
Marriage is hard work, but it is the only way to keep a good relationship from breaking down. But hard work need not be tedious. You just need to devote energy and time to your partner to maintain your relationship.
These five pointers will help you build a foundation of trust and compassion, two things that all couples should have for each other.